Brain Captures

I can tell it’s getting bad again,

When I feel that familiar worthless pang—

When I look at my phone for someone to text

And think I can’t talk to anyone at all.

I can tell it’s getting bad again,

When it’s been two days,

And I would rather starve than eat something—

At least then I might feel something.

I can tell it’s getting bad again,

When I feel myself sliding back into these old ways

that I try oh-so-hard to overcome—

But like a slick slide on the playground,

I can never quite get there.

I can tell it’s getting bad again.

And I want it to stop.

I really do.

But there’s also this part of me

That wonders

Just how deep

The rabbit hole

Goes…